1. Cats or dogs?
dogs can be trained to do all the things you don't want to do, like fetch tennis balls

2. Butterflies or birds?
butterflies because they don't wake you up with their chirping

3. Horses or cows?
cows are pretty tasty, but horses are easier to bet on

4. Turtles or snakes?
turtles, if the full question is "what animals help the clownfish in Finding Nemo?"

5. Frogs or grasshoppers?
frogs remind me of Budweiser commercials, and I find many beer ads amusing, so: frogs

6. Lions or tigers?
dunno

7. Elephants or mice?
when I was a kid I collected elephants

8. Porcupines or aardvarks?
both should not be allowed to drive

9. Unicorns or dragons?
neither

10. Thought-provoking question of the week: You live in a rather dumpy apartment. A friend offers you a chance to be a roommate at a new place s/he is moving into, but they don't allow pets. You have a pet. Do you find your pet a new home and take the new place, or do you keep your pet and stay put?

I would find a third place to live, one that isn't dumpy and also allows pets

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